rubble in my mind

There is rubble in my mind

Broken fragments of confidence that once was

Smashed bricks laying around my mind like a relic of past self-esteem

Amongst the rubble is a lost person

Where she is, nobody knows and they probably won’t find her again

Even if these relics mend, she would be different, I would be different

I’d be a stranger to past friends

Hopefully she won’t be found again, the me that’s lost

As I’ve learned a lot since I was broken down

I’ve learned not to hide my inner frown

I no longer say OK, Yes if you like, I instead have learned not to bite

I now say no, I correct others, without fear of being shunned

Without being ridiculed and abashed for being scum

I now speak my mind, I won’t change that

It did me no good years ago and that’s a fact

To keep quiet

That’s not good, it keeps you very misunderstood, trodden on, under the thumb

People think that you’re dumb when you say yes all the time or agree a lot

It’s best to say what you truly want

Living in fear of other people’s reaction will attract more people like those you hate, it’s a cosmic attraction

So you may as well be, as you like

Whether you speak your mind or not, there’s always a fight

Whose side are you on?  Your enemies or your own?

You’d better choose yourself, or you’ll always be alone

Yes my mind is broken, but it’s on it’s way to repair

Though I’ve shed so many tears and lived life in despair

Though I’m mocked most thoroughly by those who think they know

The truth as they see it, but they don’t truly know

I mock those idiots who are blind to see, the life I had to live

For I know the truth quite well and I did try to give

But people only want to see what they want to see

Whether another has told them otherwise, it makes them feel safe and brassy

But if they want to close the door to the truth that I have known, then forgive me as I close the door to those who had thrown the stones

I cannot live a lie anymore, I will speak the truth

But if you cannot bear it, then I’ll do so via sleuth

Yes my mind is broken, but the old me I’ve outgrown

A better stronger queen will emerge, for I have found my throne

So walk on by fake family, those who tried their best, to take me from my kindred and make my mind a mess

For I am not needful now, nor will I ever be

For I have found the people, who will set me free!

 

 

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