Tag Archives: death

HAPPY NEW YEAR & WELCOME 2017

 

The winter is born

It brings death to the year

Some people cry

Others they cheer

But they all call out

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

 

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Filed under Poems G - I

The Lovely Bones Review WITH SPOILERS

Spoiler Alert…

The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold churns most reader’s stomachs whenever they pick up and read the first page, let alone chapter; it is purely because of the subject matter, a young girl barely in her teens is raped and murdered by her neighbour.  Although I did find the subject matter very difficult, I saw over all of that and continued to give the book a chance.  It is something outside of the genre I would usually read, but as I read on, I realised that actually, this book deserves to be noted as a fantasy novel rather than a crime one which most people assume it to be.

When you overcome the violence and the graphicness of this novel you will come to realise that it is a beautiful story about a young dead girl coming to terms with her own death and trying to let her living family go.  Until she lets them go in her heart, they cannot stop grieving, she is the key to how much they grieve or not – the more she clings onto the living the less likely they are to heal quickly from their loss of her.

This is a lesson that Susie Salmon is learning throughout the entire novel, as well as realising that her little experience of heaven is only the beginning of what is beyond that mysterious door she keeps seeing.  It is a story about Susie’s observations of the living, including the life of her murderer Mr. Harvey and her adventures in the limbo heaven with other murdered victims.  How they are trying to use their imagination to create a world in which they want to be in, whilst dead.

The mysterious door can only be opened to Susie once she decides to move on and try not to think and worry too much about the living, when the door is opened, she can in effect find peace.  Perhaps she gets reincarnated?  Perhaps she goes to true heaven?  Nobody knows, but it would be lovely to think of it in such terms.  That is why I find the book is beautiful.  Forget the violence; forget the sordidness, just read the book to the end.  It is a treasure; it is in my top ten favourites of all time.  It is very touching and there is justice in this book, though it is very obscure and indirect.

 

 

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NaNoWriMo Day 5

NaNoWriMo word count so far… 12667 and writing first draft without revising each paragraph like I usually do, is coming up with some surprising results.  The results are similar to brainstorming and brain drain, similar to the things I tend to get on my morning pages with the Artist Way. 

So far my novel contains talking animals and several magical items I had never planned on.  The journey is cut short by a weird mode of transport and I have added a supporting character I had never planned to add, the supporting characters I had planned to add aren’t as important to the story after all; I am sensing a death coming up any time soon for those!

Yes I know death to one of the least supporting characters is callous, but it is necessary, as Stephen King always says “Kill your darlings” and I have to say, I am not uncomfortable with it.

 

 

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Filed under About my work

Tina is dead, long live me

I have chosen to die

I have chosen to grow

I have chosen to be someone you don’t know

Someone that was hidden

Far from view

Someone who knows you, but you don’t know who

I am now new

Though I am almost old

I was someone who did as they were told

Now I am fresh and I am now wise

I have changed totally in everyone’s eyes

But I am not changed because of who I am with

I am changed because I feel less stiff

I feel more free

 To be more me

Not someone that you wanted me to be

I am not Tina, I am not there

I am someone else, someone you can’t scare

Tina is dead

Long live me

Tina is gone

Now I live free

 

 

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Filed under Poems S - U

17th October 2016 – wanderings

Grey stone lay beneath my feet.  My feet are cold and bare as the fog gently surrounds me in the frosty night.  I look on in the patchy darkness, but my vision is obscured by the fog more and more.  I settle myself down upon a rock by the big oak tree and I ponder life and my existence. 

I miss you more and more. 

Your death has made me hollow and changed me in a way that I don’t understand.  People think that I am strange; I certainly have developed strange habits.  I don’t take mourning you easily.

People tell me that as time goes by the loss of you will hurt less, or at least I’d learn to cope.  But at the moment all I can think of is that it was only last week I saw you last, each day that goes on is more and more torture for me to bear, I can’t imagine not seeing you for a month, a year, a decade, half a century or however long I shall live.

Perhaps my new found madness shall kill me?  If not that then the cold will.

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Filed under Wandering In My Mind

I need to go

I need to wake from this mortal state

This mess this existence of pure pain

I cannot let it drive my soul insane

I need to be freed from these bonds of flesh

I need to go where life is fresh

 

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Filed under Poems G - I

Life is stark

Plain and pure

White not black

Light not dark

Life is stark

I cannot wait

For this endless fate

To trip away

Or fade and flay

I cannot keep it this way

I am mortal and I say nay

To pain, to suffering, to hunger and fear

I cannot just tolerate and sit here

I am more than just flesh and blood

For so many years this life I’ve trudged

I cannot wander anymore

I cannot wait to see what’s in store

I need to go

Out of this world

I need release

I need the dream-world

 

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Filed under Poems J - L

Inspired by Nox Arcana – Take 1

We’ve found thee

Little mortal

We surround thee

Whispers in the wind cry unto thee

Our names are zephyr, breath and air

We will guide thee

Don’t be scared

Little mortal

Thou fain to see

The terrors that dost follow thee

Keep away from the water’s edge

And we’ll keep thou safe

The winds we pledge

Turn not away from our winsome calls

Turn back to us or thou shall fall

The cliffs are rendering nearer and near

Be warned little one

Dost thou hear?

Nay, ye do not and now you fall

Into ice cold waters creating a crimson pool

But we don’t give up

Nay not us

We’ll call to mankind from dusk till dawn

Never ceasing

Never forlorn

It is our duty

It is our pride

We are the winds and we are the tides

And our voice we never hide

 

Inspired by Nox Arcana after listening to their music from the album “carnival of lost souls”-“cries in the night”.  This is something that I pictured when hearing the music and I put it into a prose.

 

 

 

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Filed under Short Story Series

Beware the desert

The deserts are for the wretched, the fading and the numb

The deserts are for hiding if you are lowlife scum

The deserts they will make you parched

The deserts they will kill

The deserts are not friendly

And they never ever will

The deserts are for the lonely

The deserts are for the damned

The deserts are not for sheep

And the deserts are not for lambs

The desert is and always be

A place to test your mortality

A place to die

A place to cease

A place for hindrance

And decrease

Do not go there

Not alone

Not with someone

It’s dry as bone

The desert is quite empty

Of that you can be assured

The desert is a death trap

Your death will be procured

But if you insist

Then goodbye my friend

Into the sandy depths you’ll lie

For I am done convincing you

Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye

 

 

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Filed under Poems A - C

The Watchers of the forbidden world

copyright Tina Cousins FantasyFed 2016

copyright Tina Cousins FantasyFed 2016

 

The cloud rises, twists and twirls around the forbidden mortal world
Hues of blue and grey and white forbids the passage to their sight
Unseen we are the hidden ones, forbidden to enter, forbidden to come
No one knows we are here, their cries of sadness we often hear
Forbidden to answer their prayers and cries
Forbidden to help them, unless they die
We cannot go to take their pain, we can only watch and hear in vain
We cannot cross through their gate

We can only watch their terrible fate
We are the gods they pray will come
But it’s not our world, it is not our sun
We cannot control what goes on there
Only guide them to the heavenly stair
We are forbidden to touch and be, where the mortals live and breath
We are the watchers of their endless plight
The protectors of eternal light
We are your warriors we are your knights
We tuck you into dreamtime at night
We are not evil, we are not cruel
It is not our place to rule mortals
We aren’t heartless, we aren’t depraved
We are there and ready to save
You are mortals and we are not
We are the ones that you’ve forgot
We are tender and we are true
And we’ll always be there for you
But we cannot enter through the mortal gate
We can only watch your fate
And lend a hand to the path of death
At the time of your last breath
So carefully we will take your hand
And take you to our immortal lands
Where life has set you free to be
Another watcher like me

 

 

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Filed under Short Story Series