Tag Archives: garden

Daily goals as a lifestyle

I no longer want to be in the league of procrastinating artists and writers, things are going to change.

For the past three weeks I have been living my life on a goal based lifestyle, thanks to some very motivational videos I have found on YouTube and the book I purchased last month called “Think and grow rich” By Napolean Hill.  Now I don’t fool myself for one second that art and writing is going to make me “rich” at all, don’t get me wrong – I am not just focusing on the money aspect, I am focusing on the aspect of happiness and feeling like I am achieving something, even if the rewards are purely emotional.

Obviously money would be nice, but ultimately, health and personal achievements for me, leads to a happy life and that is more important to me right now than financial gain.

I have had these talks before on my blog, the “No longer procrastinating personal prep talks” and they have always reached a point of returning back to old comfortable habits with excuses after excuses after excuses – I am sick and tired of failing myself and I watched on one of these videos last week that when you reach a point of being sick and tired of being sick and tired that’s when your life will start to change and I have reached that point in my life.

Living life day to day with goal based intentions for every day, is working out for me.  On the nights I forget to give myself a goal for the next day, I notice I go back into old habits, so I am almost paranoid that the last thing I do before I go to sleep each night is to list my goals for the following day, so I don’t slip up again.

Most of my goals are simple and may seem like nothing to anybody – how much do you think you are going to achieve in a day by doing these things which in their eyes, could be procrastination anyway – but for me, it is constructive.  It keeps me doing the “good habits” which make me a productive person.

My usual day to day goals are;

To write my morning pages via a site called 750words.com – this is non-negotiable, this is a must do, everyday forever.

Revising at least two pages of my old NaNoWriMo attempt from 2016, this was abandoned and forgotten in my drawers since 30th November 2016.

Writing two poems for advanced schedule posting on my blog, I am a month in advance at the moment, so the poems you are currently reading were written approximately a month before you are actually reading them.

Practise some sketches and art pieces in my sketch book, at least half a page a day.

Then there is a fifth random goal, it could be anything, such as take a walk, do something particular in the garden, bake a cake, visit someone, anything really.

This isn’t all that I do in my day, this is part of my daily goals, the idea is to get me into the habit of having something to wake up for, something to do.  I lost my purpose in life by allowing sickness to dominate me, but now I am trying to take back some kind of control in my life again and so far it is working.   I would never have thought about living my life in a goal based day to day way, if it wasn’t for the motivational archive on YouTube.

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Things of December

Recently received books and movies via gifts or personal purchase have been;

Clash of the Titans DVD the 2010 version with Liam Neeson

Blue Planet II a hardback book

Paul O’Grady’s “country life” hardback book

Raising the Dead: The Men Who Created Frankenstein by Andy Dougan (gift from nephew to me)

RHS What Plant Where Encyclopaedia by DK Publishing

Hobgoblins–The Secret Histories by Ari Berk (A gift to my son from his best-friend but I read it first)

The Box-set of The Hunger Games DVDs

All of these came into my house in the month of December 2017.

Other purchases or gifts I feel match fantasy or horror are…

Quite a few different types of gemstones, especially hypersthene, a tigers eye pendulum, a lapis lazuli gemstone for Henry, A black onyx pendulum, a Rhodonite pendulum for my Henry, an apatite, a large rose quartz the size of a small hot crossed bun and last but not least a hematite thumb ring. 

I bought incense and a new incense charcoal burner in the shape of a Chinese lotus flower.  The scents were vanilla, cinnamon, patchouli, dragon’s blood, rose and lily.  I can’t burn these things when Henry is at home; I have to do them when he is at school and open all the windows afterwards because he is prone to headaches.

I was gifted a fairy house garden ornament in the shape of a mushroom at Christmas from my husband Paul and Mrs Tiggy Winkle acting as the old woman in the shoe ornament and a wolf trinket box.  I do like weird stuff.  He bought me a good sized wooden box too, the shape and style of a pirates treasure chest and it fits all of my gemstones in perfectly with room for half again!  It really does look like a real pirate’s chest now with all of those gemstones in it.

I am a big kid, anything remotely regarding fantasy or horror and I like it.  Depends what it is however but my house certainly shows what I love in every nook and cranny!  I am not averse to having marvels cushion on my sofa for example!

It is difficult when friends and relatives visit because they presume I allow Henry to rule the roost, but the look on their faces when I say “No, it’s for me, I wanted it there”.  They do ask occasionally whether or not I should put such things in my bedroom?  I can’t put everything there!  Besides, what is wrong with a marvel cushion?  A soft toy of the joker on my PC desk?  3 snow globes on the bookshelves?  Four different types of calendars in the living room, Gothic, minions, marvel, wolves and then there is DC comics in the dining room with an RSPB one.  The first of every month is interesting for me, I like guessing which 1 of the many calendars around the house my husband will forget to change!  Me and Henry take bets with fruit pastilles!

I love the fact that I can be so free to be more me, with Paul lately.  He always wanted me to be me, but I was never confident enough to make it reflect in my home and for the first 5yrs living together it was all cream and browns around the house to make it look more like a normal household – yeurgh.  But now it’s green, yellow, with the occasional quirky wallpaper.  In the living room on just one wall there is wallpaper that looks like pastel version of the trees depicted in the movie The Lorax.  In the bathroom it is mostly white tiled but we are going to buy dolphin and coral wallpaper next month.  The kitchen is kitted out with tiles a harlequin would love, also next month we are buying wallpaper for just one side of the kitchen and that will be in the style of Mediterranean food.  Our bedroom is royal purple and soon I will be adding cerise to the other side of the wall, I also wanted to get door murals to make the doors of the house look like medieval castle doors!

I refuse to grow up.

Anyway, have a HAPPY NEW YEAR all of you ❤

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Fragaria & The Magic Daffodil

I’ve made a new category today as well as changed the theme of this blog, today’s new category is “About My Work” it’s where you can find out how I got some of my ideas and how I think (dare you enter the crevices of my mind that is).

The story and poem of “The Magic Daffodil” had a fairy character called Fragaria, I got this weird name from the Latin name of the strawberry Fragaria ananassa, pretty useful to think about foreign ways of saying things or Latinised versions for unique names in fantasy stories in my opinion.  I do this a lot; Hail very nearly became Yuki, which is snow in Japanese and I think everybody who has ever touched on trying to learn French knows that Mrs Fraise’s name is taken from the French word for strawberries too?

I originally wrote this as a poem, thinking nothing more on it, a few hours after I wrote it, I felt I needed to enhance the work as a short story because it was nagging me too much to ignore.

I remembered reading somewhere about a year ago that publishers are desperately seeking new and traditional fairy stories for children and I think I touched on that, I was doubtful about putting the poem and story onto my blog because I am unsure if publishers will touch it being it’s been put on the web now, what do you think?  Do you think having this put up here will affect it being published into an anthology or winning a short story contest?

I believe the poem and story invented itself in my mind because of a mix of things I’ve read and watched over the past year; I’ve started to learn about faeriecraft and various white witch methods of calling up nature spirits and faeries to assist in people’s lives, I have the fairy bible by Teresa Moorey and faeriecraft by Alice Geddes-Ward on my nearest shelves for constant reference. 

Nature spirits and so forth I do believe in and I meditate frequently as I see unexplainable things – for example sometimes when I am not thinking about them I see a fairy type person laying down on a log in the garden, then I turn my head to tell someone and look back it’s turned into a nodule on the log, then I blink and the nodule gets smaller and blink again, totally gone.  I think I am naturally crazy too, though, I love science so I try to work it out scientifically, but I love playing with my imagination, so I try to believe in some things to keep the magic in me alive, ha-ha.

Other things that bought about the cocktail that is known as “The Magic Daffodil” is the fact I’ve read a book called “The Snow Child” where a little girl comes and goes in snowy Alaska like a magic little wild fairy.  Also, it’s been the snowiest year I’ve ever known in the UK, and the longest winter I’ve ever experienced, so to me, that had a big impact too.

I’ve also been eating imported strawberries all week, leading up to writing the story as well and planted some of them from Spalding bulb into troughs.

My poems have been mostly about heart-break I think, too?  So that might have had something to do with it as well.

I am surprised by what I did because that night I wasn’t very well at all and I didn’t really want to work, but I just had to, I kept getting these little nagging poetic lines coming into my head and I must admit, most of my poetic work comes whilst sitting on the toilet… it’s annoying, but true, every one of my very best poems must have started on that toilet, sometimes I forget them as I am coming down the stairs again, because my little boy is up to something, so I must start leaving a note pad and pen in there.

I am begging to think whether or not it would be crazy to fashion a toilet into a chair for my office area?

Anyway, that’s it for now; hope you enjoyed the flow of my mind?

 

 

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Tale of a magic daffodil

Fragaria, a little red haired fairy likes to live in gardens, particularly rose gardens, particularly in spring.   She especially loves attending the spring ball even though she never had a date to go with; she’s always with the shrinking violet fays, the shy retiring fays.

One day, just at the beginning of winter this all changed, or so she thought.  A fine young fairy swain zoomed into her life from the snow, or so it seemed.

“Greetings fair maiden” said the white haired gent, taking off his ice capped hat and bowing courteously to her.

She instantly shied away behind a sleeping lilac bush and hoped she would sink into the soil beneath, but she couldn’t, for the ground was frozen solid, so she had to grin and bare this strange newcomer to the garden.

“Hope I didn’t alarm you, there” said the brazen character.

All Fragaria could do was giggle and skip across the garden behind an ash tree.

“Ah, I see, you’d like a game of chase?” asked the stranger.

He quickly ran after her, this frightened Fragaria and she ran across the garden and hid behind flower pots, sleeping rose bushes, garden gnomes and various other objects in order to keep away from this strange, but handsome stalker, but he still wouldn’t quit.  Poor Fragaria tried hard to do away with his advances, she quickly hopped over a large rock but tumbled the wrong way and fell into the half frozen pond and went down with an almighty splash into the icy depths.

The young swain leapt in after her and pulled her out after cutting away some of the algae that tied itself around her legs. 

He wrapped her up in his rabbit skin coat and carried her off to a little clearing in the ivy where he lit up a small fire for her to warm herself up and dry.

The whole time she never spoke to him, both of them were looking at each other apologetically, Fragaria with shy sideways glances and slowly sipping hot cups of rosehip tea.

“What kind of fay are you”?  He eventually asked.

“I was thinking the same of you, but since you asked first, I’m part rose and strawberry fay, strawberry on my father’s side, I’m Fragaria Fraise”.  She proudly announced.

“I’m Hail, I’m a winter fairy” He said, as though she should have known that.

From then onwards their meets were regular and Fragaria became ever more attached to this gentleman, her heart grew light and fluffy with the love that started to grow.

She started planning in her head the ball gown she’ll make for the spring ball, she planned it all completely and she began to quiver with excitement, until the day the snow started to melt.

“I have some bad news for you Fragaria”. Hail reluctantly said.

“In the next few days I’ll have to leave this place and I am not sure when I’ll return, I hope you understand?” said Hail, with all sincerity.

Fragaria immediately felt shattered into a million pieces, she found someone to go to the spring ball with, yet now he has to leave and the spring ball is only a month away she thought.

“I’ll come and fetch you late this afternoon; the sun will be in the perfect spot to start melting those long icicles I told you about and I don’t want you to miss a thing”.  He said, and he skipped away merrily, unknowing of what he had done to poor Fragaria.

Fragaria ran home to her mother in tears. 

“What’s the matter with you dear child?” said Fragaria’s mother. 

“Hail said he is leaving me, now I won’t have anyone to go to the ball with” she wailed.

“Hail? You never mentioned Hai… oh no!” stopped her mother suddenly, she knew what a name like Hail meant; she was a fairy of the world, she knew winter fairies came and went like rain, well, during the winter that is and sometimes late spring snow showers bring them back and hail storms in random times of the year, generally a winter fairy was bad news to the likes of other fairy’s in fact all seasonal fairies were:

“I can’t bare the pain mother; I can’t bare it I tell you”, whimpered Fragaria.

“There, there, I know what we can do if you want this pain to stop and if you’re sure he won’t come back to you” said Fragaria’s mother.

“What? What is it?  I’ll do anything to stop this hurt”. Fragaria begged.

“Luckily I noticed one in full bloom this morning, where the snow melted a few days ago because it gets a lot of sunlight there by the lawn, well anyway there I found it, a DAFFODIL, all you have to do is go and crawl right in and it will sense your pain and it will set things to rights!” said Fragaria’s mother in excitement.

Fragaria looked up at her mother and without a word dashed tearfully through the garden to where her mother had directed her and climbed up into the daffodil and cried herself to sleep.

Fragaria had the most peculiar dream; she dreamt the flower sprayed perfume at her and told her that to put all her woes behind her and that friendship is immortal.

When she woke up, she felt no more pain, but had sunny memories of Hail and her sharing fun in the snow like happy children.

She went home and had a lovely supper, of nettle soup, followed by spiced beetroot salad, when suddenly there was a knock on the door of their little tree house, Fragaria’s mother opened the door to find a crestfallen Hail standing there.

“Are you Hail?” asked Fragaria’s mother. 

“Yes Mrs Fraise, do you know where she is?  I was due to meet with her late this afternoon to look at some icicles melting in the sundown and I noticed a fox going under the garden shed and I got worried for her because she didn’t turn up”.  He said dolefully.

“Don’t worry about a thing, Fragaria is here with us, eating a lovely beetroot salad, but I thought you should know, she’s been to the daffodil about you.” said Mrs Fraise, warningly.

“Oh no, she thought… oh dear no, then I’ll go there myself presently” he said dejectedly. 

Mrs Fraise just stood and nodded.

“That is the best you can do, she’ll never leave the gardens, you know that, it’s in our blood, it’s in all our blood to stay with who we belong, and it’s only fair”.  She said.

Hail agreed and went to the daffodil, where he too had memories of friendship and child games in the snow with Fragaria, and every winter there on in, they met up and played in the snow together, never ever falling in love with each other again… but that was for the best, for they both knew they loved their birth right too much to lose and each found love in their own way eventually.

© Tina Cousins 2013

This story was influenced by the poem I wrote earlier called “The magic daffodil”, it is also semi-influenced by a novel I read last month called “The Snow Child” By Eowyn Ivey.

This idea happened completely at random.  I wrote a poem, the poem sounded like a story and I sat back all day thinking, wow, this needs to become a short story and there it is, right up there, winking at you, my story.

I feel the story was slap dashed, I don’t think it’s well written.  I hoped for it to come across like an old fairy tale, but I am unsure if my voice/style is any good.  But anyway, critics are most welcomed to comment.

I am here to hone my skills, not flaunt them… well, partly so.

 

 

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