Tag Archives: Greek

Update 13th January 2018

Hardly any writing done for anything has been done this week due to the fact that I’ve had a very painful and persistent ear infection again and a slight cold.  I found out in more depths what is wrong with me, what is wrong with my immune system though I am still being investigated for suspected two or three other things that are more severe, I won’t know the outcome of these tests for another three months at least.  But part of the parcel of why my immune system is weak is because of the pernicious anaemia I’ve had since I was a young teenager (nobody really bothered to explain to me what that is, I presumed (like my mother) that is was just chronic anaemia, but it is more than that).  Pernicious anaemia can cause deficiencies in the body and can affect the lining of the stomach and the whole digestive system if left untreated, triggering irritable bowel syndrome eventually.

Because my mother never really bothered to pay attention to doctors or ask them questions we just made our presumptions and this has developed into reflux and irritable bowel syndrome causing me to have intolerances these days that are so severe I have to completely avoid lactose and egg, though I can nibble a little at gluten without too much problems now I have solicited a fodmap diet to eliminate IBS triggers and I am getting a little bit better for it.  I can eat a small amount of gluten twice a week, but I do try and stay away from it as much as possible so not to trigger a bigger reaction like I used to have.  The other suspicions are still suspicions regarding the spleen, chrohns disease and inflammatory bowel disease which is entirely different to IBS.  Fodmap diet means I have to eliminate foods that I think would not be harmful to IBS; I have found it astounding the types of food to avoid because it triggers a response in the digestive system to play up.  Foods such as apples all high fructose foods and cruciferous vegetables, which is a shame as red apples and broccoli form part of my staple.

On a positive note I have heard rumors from a lot of people that if I have a very tightly regimented fodmap diet high in blueberries and soya and probiotics then I could effectively cure my IBS within a few months.

My husband is very supportive about this new diet change and has even adopted a household approach to eating healthier and lowering everybody’s risk of developing a digestive disorder, though he hasn’t cut out lactose and gluten for him and Henry as they don’t need to.  We are now eating more fish, chicken and rice than we used to and we ate more of that than an average British family before this anyway!  Our diet now resembles more Mediterranean meets the Caribbean, which makes me happier anyway, never did have the British palate.

Now instead of potatoes with bland steamed vegetables and sausages, we now only have that rarely say once every couple of months and now our more usual diet is rice mixed with tomatoes, sweetcorn, peas and basil with salmon and a small Greek salad (no cheese or olives due to triggers).  Our idea of a Greek salad is rocket, spinach, red onion, sweetcorn, red peppers, and cucumbers, tomatoes, on average with the occasional chopped avocado or beetroot (but that is a sparse addition).  Our usual puddings after dinner is now coconut & raspberry jam gluten free cake with custard or skip it until an hour later where we have popcorn or honey nuts.

Our most British dinner is the chicken Sunday roast with gluten free alternatives for Yorkshire puddings, stuffing and gravy.

Our most likely weekend breakfast is kippers with tomatoes and gluten free bread, weekday breakfast porridge alternating with fruits on it, cinnamon or various flavours of jam.

Usual snacks need to be amended because I go for nuts and salt and vinegar crisps, which vinegar is a trigger, but it is hard to find gluten free and lactose free snacks that are off the fodmap.  So I tend to go hungry a lot of the time these days, particularly as I never feel hungry at breakfast or lunch so often skip those dinners and I don’t have a large one at the end of the day anymore because I simply can’t eat big anymore, my stomach just can’t cope with anything bigger than a large jacket potato with tuna in regards to meal size.

I am losing a lot of weight since going on the FodMap diet; I have lost almost a stone in weight in 10 days and I don’t recommend how you can do it, because for a lot of the time I am starving hungry, but have no room in the stomach for anything else it is strange.

So that’s an update on little ol me.

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daily pages 2 2015

I am not going to fall at the first hurdle of writing my daily pages, though currently it is hard to do when I have a constantly screaming 4yr old boy in the room with me and I have a mild headache with a double ear infection. Trying to think positively and trying to imagine I am well, I am healthy and I am not irritated by senseless and mindless toddler noises… trying, but not successfully.
My husband wants to take the family for a walk around the estate and village, but I am also interested in not only writing these daily pages right now which could take me about 90 minutes if I can’t think of anything to say, but I also want to watch whilst typing this a documentary about Neanderthals, of which I am convinced my son is one.
Also my brain is occupied with the music theme tune of a children’s program called gigglebiz, a program I hate, but the tune is annoyingly catchy on a religious level; that’s how I believe religion became so successful, good music, great lyrics, catchy and annoying tunes that you keep hearing yourself singing or whistling and before you know it, you think you’re religious because you like the music… scary stuff.
Want to control the world? Be a great musician that can create catchy to borderline annoying tunes that people will love to hate, and your work will never be forgotten and before long people will be living what you’ve written… think hippy! Think happy clappy!
People hate happy clappy because it gets into you so much if you allow yourself to listen to it.
Positive energy is just as catching as negative energy, though some positive energy can be difficult to get rubbed with, because there is always some kind of recoil from others… they’re so used to feeling negative and seeing things in a bleak way, that the light scares them… think about being in a cinema during the day then leaving the cinema at high noon with clear blue skies… painful huh? Energy works pretty much the same way.
Anyway on another note I have been playing word tornado on facebook a lot this afternoon and losing dramatically, seems like the whole world gets over 700 points and I only get an average of 580 – you know I doubt the authenticity of their so called talent because I play scrabble a lot offline with people and I am always the winner. I have a very broad vocabulary and a very cunning way in using the board and I hang around with people with very high IQs, so I guess there’s a lot of internet game cheating going on there.
What is the point? It’s a game, you don’t feel the same way when you cheat and win in a game than when you play honestly and win, so why?
I cannot believe that everyone I play against is a genius.
In fact I absolutely refused to believe it.
Anyway, rant about game cheating aside, for the last 3 months I have repeatedly borrowed one book from my local library called “The art of Gothic music and fashion” by Natasha Scharf. It’s quite a read and quite inspiring.
It’s one of those books that have double pages on each page, I am unsure what it is called, but you can sometimes find old Sherlock Holmes books that are like that, like newspapers.
In the books there is a lot about all types of gothic people, from Lolita goths to steampunks, unfortunately there is nothing in there about some people I know in the BDSM scene who are what is known as “Cyberdogs” gothic, black leather wearing dog roleplayers that where fetish dog masks, something that I have seen once or twice during my travels to Camden Town.
However, talking of cyberdogs the fashion company was mentioned there.
Woof, I think I would have liked to of come under that category if I was still available in the BDSM scene, though with my weight I’d probably look like some overweight bulldog… which no offense to bulldog enthusiasts or bulldogs in general, to me that’s not a good look.
I am listening to beautiful Greek music whilst typing this, yes the Neanderthal program was turned off about 90 minutes ago and I had a long game of online word tornado.
My toddler is sitting on the sofa bleary eyed with tonsillitis and all I can do is recoil as I am only just getting over severe pharyngitis where my GP felt I was nearly hospitalised earlier on this week.
I mentioned the Greek music because I remember a time I heard this exact song played at my mum’s friend’s house Niki and my mum mistook it for Asian music and told her, in an offensive tone to turn off the said music in the most derogatory term of phrase she could come out with – my mum’s friend Niki replied with zeal and shock and horror, that it’s not that type of music at all it’s Greek! To which mum seemed very embarrassed.
I love all cultures, I love their music, their food, their ways, I love learning about people from all walks of life, my only prejudice is religion of any mainstream kind, especially if people kill for the sake of their religion, or if their religion has a history of killing people when conversion was impossible.
Now my randomiser has turned on some medieval music, I am very eclectic (nearly wrote epileptic), my brother is an epileptic and I was told I have a minor form of it by a Rugby GP because I said I get some sensations on my head like people are stroking my hair from time to time which seems to be getting more intense lately, I don’t believe him personally.
I started these daily pages about 4 hours ago, still not finished. I am not in a creative mood today, today is a day off after all, it’s Sunday.
It’s not that I am not dedicated to my work, but today I woke up late and I felt in a reading or scrabble like game mood, particularly as my back is still getting over the fast bumpy bus ride I had into Coventry yesterday, I think they’ve sprained my back!
I am by far a hypochondriac by the way! Seriously not one, just bloody unlucky!
I also have a craving to watch the first episode of Game of Thrones on DVD rental by lovefilm, but when my 4yr old son is awake I won’t, he will not be allowed to watch such violence, I demand that! Also, if I couldn’t watch that then I would like to watch Van Helsing because in my opinion that’s very mild for a child to watch in comparison to other vampire movies, but when a female vampire threw the cow at a building Henry freaked out and got very upset over the mistreatment of the cow last year that he categorically hates vampires – bursts into tears, how can anyone hate them? They’re my kindred spirits!
My son hates me since; especially when I told him I love vampires and that I am one in my books.
All jokes aside our relationship did change after that movie.
I have at least another 600 words to write before the 3 pages are done for the day.
I still find it annoying that some relatives watch this blog, just so they can stop me talking about things that are TRUE AND REAL but they’d rather hide it under the carpet like some dirty secret. They keep brain washing me about skeletons in the closet and my brother isn’t the only relative either, some other relatives are encouraging me to speak the truth, some of them will shock my immediate family because it’s not who they think they are, it’s the most unlikeliest.
Because I was raised in a very unhappy environment, but no one is allowed to know that as I will be sued for defamation apparently.
So yes, like always, I am living under the shadows of blackmail by my bullying family.
It’s infuriating because originally this blog was set up as a form of therapy to overcome my problems, by the advice of my psychologist.
If I ever became famous, I would want people to know the whole me, no holds barred – not because I am an attention seeker, but because I don’t like skeletons in the closet. I would rather be honest and forthright to people, instead of sitting back meekly being a mystery – because let’s face it, before I moved in with my husband I hate no life before the age of 26yrs old… so that’s going to raise a lot of uncomfortable questions in itself, because my life, my experiences up until that point were very, very minimal and people will think that there were bad things about me directly, when in fact it wasn’t – it was things happening to me by bad people.
I also want to raise awareness of certain things once I am famous or even before I am famous, because there are a lot more ways to abuse a child or a relative that people originally think.
Isolating them, home-educating them to isolate them further, when they become adults, making major life decisions for them because if they refuse they will have bad things happen to them and they live constantly in blackmail. I put my foot down against my mother in 2013 because she tried to force me to commit fraud, that’s the truth behind why I don’t like contact with her now. Because she tried her best to make me commit a crime which is not within my nature, Paul was abhorred and it was him, along with a family support worker and my psychologist that felt that the break had to be made as I cannot raise a child around a grandmother who thinks that fraud is OK on certain conditions and that you’re a bad person if you don’t do it for your mother/grandmother.
Awareness of different kinds of abuse needs to be raised.

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