Tag Archives: mortal

Vampire Loyalty

I have been watching Vampire Diaries season one this week, I have just finished episode fourteen and I have to say, I am a little disappointed with the lack of vampire loyalty in the plot.  Vampires seem to kill more vampires than they do people in this show and I have to ask, what is that all about?  From what I know of vampires if they are not solitary creatures they are pack animals and I think that the writers here had a hard time trying to decide which type of vampire they wanted to write about.  It is like they cannot decide whether they want a solitary vampire, a vampire twosome that has run away from the pack, or a pack style vampire story.

That’s my observation so far with the series.

Another observation is this, when are we going to get a TV series that concentrates purely on vampires rather than mortal/vampire romances and also throwing in werewolves, witches and other things into the equation too?  When is this going to happen?  When are we going to get a TV series where vampires have vampire relationships and there are no other supernatural beings but them?

I am waiting on that…

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Inspired by Nox Arcana – Take 1

We’ve found thee

Little mortal

We surround thee

Whispers in the wind cry unto thee

Our names are zephyr, breath and air

We will guide thee

Don’t be scared

Little mortal

Thou fain to see

The terrors that dost follow thee

Keep away from the water’s edge

And we’ll keep thou safe

The winds we pledge

Turn not away from our winsome calls

Turn back to us or thou shall fall

The cliffs are rendering nearer and near

Be warned little one

Dost thou hear?

Nay, ye do not and now you fall

Into ice cold waters creating a crimson pool

But we don’t give up

Nay not us

We’ll call to mankind from dusk till dawn

Never ceasing

Never forlorn

It is our duty

It is our pride

We are the winds and we are the tides

And our voice we never hide

 

Inspired by Nox Arcana after listening to their music from the album “carnival of lost souls”-“cries in the night”.  This is something that I pictured when hearing the music and I put it into a prose.

 

 

 

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The Watchers of the forbidden world

copyright Tina Cousins FantasyFed 2016

copyright Tina Cousins FantasyFed 2016

 

The cloud rises, twists and twirls around the forbidden mortal world
Hues of blue and grey and white forbids the passage to their sight
Unseen we are the hidden ones, forbidden to enter, forbidden to come
No one knows we are here, their cries of sadness we often hear
Forbidden to answer their prayers and cries
Forbidden to help them, unless they die
We cannot go to take their pain, we can only watch and hear in vain
We cannot cross through their gate

We can only watch their terrible fate
We are the gods they pray will come
But it’s not our world, it is not our sun
We cannot control what goes on there
Only guide them to the heavenly stair
We are forbidden to touch and be, where the mortals live and breath
We are the watchers of their endless plight
The protectors of eternal light
We are your warriors we are your knights
We tuck you into dreamtime at night
We are not evil, we are not cruel
It is not our place to rule mortals
We aren’t heartless, we aren’t depraved
We are there and ready to save
You are mortals and we are not
We are the ones that you’ve forgot
We are tender and we are true
And we’ll always be there for you
But we cannot enter through the mortal gate
We can only watch your fate
And lend a hand to the path of death
At the time of your last breath
So carefully we will take your hand
And take you to our immortal lands
Where life has set you free to be
Another watcher like me

 

 

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Loyalty, Vampires and Passion

I adore vampires, I am not sure if I’ve ever made that clear on here before (grins knowingly) and I’ve been thinking about them a lot today. I’ve been thinking about my favourite vampires, Judas Iscariot from Dracula 2000, John Carpenters VAMPIRES, Interview with the vampire and Daughter of Darkness to name but a few.
I love the culture surrounding vampires and everything Gothic, from the strange music options, to the fashion, the architecture and the darkness of it all, to the sheer sinfulness of loving it.
I love the strangest things and the strangest things inspire me to write and paint.
The strange haunting sounds of the music from Nox Arcana in their album Transylvania = visitors in the night, to their album shadow of the raven = the black cat wails and cries of a demon cat and the semi-Gregorian chants throughout all their albums.
I love the tribal belly dance scene, the gothic belly dancers from tribal fusion, I collect the DVDs regularly, I am a particular fan of Rachel Brice – to me, all of this just oozes vampire.
As a former belly dancer myself (not professionally) I am saddened that I didn’t learn about the tribal fusion style dancers until 2yrs after I gave up the dances, if I had known beforehand I think I would have sought them out and have become professional. I adore the dances and I would love someday to have a daughter who has the same interests in it as I do.
Unlike a lot of traditionalists, I don’t see belly dance as a thing solely for women, there is a form of belly dance for men! In fact it was traditional for both sexes to belly dance right up until the Persian Empire was created, then it was almost eradicated entirely for a practise for men and became a very sexualised dance solely for women by the Persian conquerors. The dance is debated to have originally come from the eastern side of Greece, near Salonica.
There is a dancer known as Prince Andrew which practises the masculine form, by belly dancing with a sword balanced on his naked waist and hips and balanced on his head. I find it very sexy, a very sensual dance. He looks almost like a character from Sinbad and the eye of the tiger; though his style is considered to be indo belly dance, a kind of traditional Indian style.
Here are a couple of videos with Prince Andrew dancing.
https://www.bing.com/videos/search?

q=male+belly+dancer+prince&&view=detail&mid=3920BBFA2116361685563920BBFA211636168556&rvsmid=D607C79DEB3A3D2D04ACD607C79DEB3A3D2D04AC&fsscr=0&FORM=VDFSRV
https://www.bing.com/videos/search?

q=male+belly+dancer+prince&&view=detail&mid=D607C79DEB3A3D2D04ACD607C79DEB3A3D2D04AC&rvsmid=D607C79DEB3A3D2D04ACD607C79DEB3A3D2D04AC&fsscr=0&FORM=VDFSRV

Masculine belly dance is starting to become popularised once again, there are more and more male dancers taking to the scene which I find rather exciting.
Another form of dance I like and think is very Gothic, is fire dancing.
I think vampires are very passionate beings, they put their heart and their soul into everything they do, they surround themselves with beautiful things, things they love, because eternity is a long time if you are around things you dislike or things that do not give you pleasure.
I think because they have eternity on their hands, they go out of their way to surround themselves with things that make them happy, collections from the past and even collecting newly sired people to be around them, of the nature that they like and connect with or that feel familiar to them. This is what I think happened to Lestat in Anne Rice’s vampire chronicles. I think Lestat was very nostalgic and may have seen something in Louis that attracted him to sire him, because he reminded him of someone he knew in his mortal life. Whether or not the relationship was compatible it didn’t matter to Lestat, he wanted familiarity and companionship and for a while he got it from Louis.
I feel very sad for Lestat, he seemed very alone. I think he and I would have got along very well together if he were real. I certainly would never leave his side; I am loyal to a fault with anyone I think is akin to me – not so loyal to those who are not akin to me however; being akin means more to me than being simply blood related, it is how our very essences match each other, how we connect, do we click? If not, then the relationship will be very short lived.
I consider myself to be a very passionate person. I am passionate about everything that I do and I seldom do anything that I am not passionate about. If I find it boring, I won’t do it, I will delegate – which is what I do even for my online games. I delegate the boring parts of the game to Paul, feeding my pets for example or setting them up for adoption for me. Some people call it being lazy; I call it, living my life to the fullest, and why not? Mortal lives are short anyway, there is no vampire going to sire me in this world. More is the pity.
That’s why I envelop myself with vampire mythology, vampire movies, haunting music, music boxes, pictures of wolves, bats and gothic castles around the house, thick wine coloured velvet curtains in the living room, old roses in the front garden with lilac and irises. Royal purple walls in the bedroom with a black carpet and red bedding. But not everything about my house is wonderfully gothic; unfortunately, there are a lot of places I need to decorate in order to eradicate the cold ice white walls my mother painted in most of the rooms downstairs. The brown sofa is a far cry from what I think is perfect, but it will do for the time being.
I have owl ornaments everywhere, a box filled with raven feathers, a raven feather silver necklace I wear on very special occasions. I miss the tiger’s eye ring my ex stole from me and the wolf fleece blanket with the midnight blue sky and full moon another ex-took from me. Yes I know, they are just things, but they were mine and I loved them. Especially the ring, that was special – my dad seldom could afford to give me anything with the money my mum would allow him, so anything he gave me was more precious than life’s blood, he gave me that ring, my ex stole it and that hurts.
It wasn’t all that particular ex stole, he stole an heirloom, the ring was an heirloom, he also stole my savings and unbeknownst to my mother at the time I had savings of £12,000 and when he dumped me I had less than £500 left.
It is this ex that made me dominant. After he hurt me and abused me in more ways than one, I became bitter against men in general for about six years, the boyfriends I had before Paul, were all submissive in the BDSM scene. Paul however wasn’t, but he wasn’t prepared to take me as a submissive, he reckoned he saw the true nature of me that was hidden because of abuse. I must admit that I had a lot of my gumption beaten out of me over the years before I met Paul. Since living with Paul the tolerance for other people negative behaviours towards me are at a minimum, boy have I got feisty since meeting Paul and he thinks this is a good thing.
I have a very low tolerance for anyone destroying my peace, destroying what I have accomplished since disowning my mother three years ago, I have a very short fuse for anything that upsets me. Learn what I like, learn my boundaries and we can be very good friends, solid in fact.
I have no qualms telling people that I demand a lot, I demand attention and the best, I demand love, I demand to be considered precious and above all, I demand loyalty not only for me, but my chosen family.
I consider my family as a pack, a clan, a tribe – very similar to how people view vampires, they have their little nest of individuals that stick together, I consider myself and the members of my house to be like this… a solid loyal unit.
I crave a large pack, whether fashioned together with a few like-minded friends or having children and teaching them loyalty and supportiveness of each other.
This is one the most unforgiving things I cannot stand about my mother. The bridges she burned when the family needed her the most, she’s a quitter. I’ve never been a quitter, but thanks to the bridges she burned not a lot of family wants to talk with me anymore, except for my father’s side of the family. They associate me as her little goon, because I was never allowed to leave her side right up until I was 27yrs old, I went everywhere with her, even missing school for home education to be with her, because she demanded it. As far as many relatives and friends were concerned I and my mother seemed close, too close, unnaturally close, so many believed we held the same values. In fact we’re total opposites.
My heart breaks day in and day out because of the family isolation I’ve endured because of her. When granddad was alive, I would be in regular contact of so many relatives, I was socialising at the weekends with the grandchildren of his cousins! Now that’s extensive family for you, what’s more is I was lucky enough as a child to have this happen on both sides of the family. My father’s side of the family are in regular contact with my grandmother’s siblings grandchildren! But again, because my mother isolates herself, she has therefore isolated me and my father from both sides of the family over the years.
I went from having approximately 15 to 20 visitors a week at the house, all different, all relatives, and having up to 18 people visit on Christmas Eve or Christmas Evening, to getting a visitor once a fortnight, the same one or two people and then only 6 for Christmas dinner, then down to just 5 for Christmas dinner and a visit from my brother and his girlfriend once a month.
I have a void that has not been filled since.
This is why I am in the scene, not the Gothic scene, but the BDSM scene. This is why I am so open-minded about open-relationships, I crave a large family and if I can’t make one through having children, then I intend to grow a large network and I think it is very unfair for anyone to try and deny me that.
I love vampires as they are eternally loyal and passionate.

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What are vampires to me?

To me, a vampire is never messy when actually feeding. They take great care and consideration when feeding not to leave any evidence behind that could trace back to them. They respect their prey, they respect their prey for the life that is sacrificed in order to keep its own life flowing. They are shrewd by nature, but considerate and well-mannered.

Vampires generally do not live alone; they go about in packs and travel a lot during the night to hunt. They do not however, hunt in packs unless they are settling scores. Where they hunt and how they hunt is usually discussed within their nests to avoid any pattern setting. Typically a vampire will travel to hunt anywhere within a 200 mile radius of their home, they avoid a pattern being set by having one large nest in every 30 to 50 mile radius near large populations and generally swap and change their abode with others as they are not limited to their favourite pack members, but the whole extension of the vampire network.

Vampires typically accept each other very easily and are very protective of all other vampires of their breed, treat each other as though they were very, very close siblings, even if they only ever meet each other once a decade.  They know who is a vampire and who isn’t instinctively and they never get it wrong.

If a vampire isn’t seen to have an instinct to protect or love their own kind easily, they tend to either destroy themselves or become destroyed by the pack members within one lunar cycle.

Vampires have a strong sense of pack relations and traditions. The older they get the more refined they become of the mortal culture that surrounds them. They maintain traditional values; they maintain etiquette and react to the area as the highest possible class that’s available. The vampires have their own dates for special occasions and have their very own culture which they all respect and protect fiercely. Anyone who is sloppy, anyone who acts out of line threatens the very essence of the pack and they don’t allow this and like wolves will either kill off or run out of the pack the one who upsets anything. Along with their traditions there is a hierarchy that is respected profusely, there is a system as to who is top dog and who isn’t and anyone challenging that upsets the pack and if you upset the pack, you die, simple as that.

Despite the respect for mortals they have, they also understand that they are killers and they have to end lives sooner or later and if they don’t, they betray themselves and their nature.

If you are considered physically or more importantly mentally too weak for the pack, they will end your existence. If you are a sloppy killer, you will be killed. If you lure hunters to the pack, you will be destroyed, if you go against tradition you will die and if you ever commit a crime against a member of the pack you will be trialled and if found guilty tortured horribly before you die.

Vampires respect each other, they respect the hierarchy and they respect traditions. They do not treat each other as slaves, they do not turn their own kind away and they always help out.

They work together to keep each other safe and happy.

They hide from sunlight but are not completely at risk in mild light, such as twilight, dawn, and dusk, low light day like cloudy rainstorm weather or fog.

They have no problems with religious artefacts, water or garlic.

But like anything can be killed with a stake through the heart.

My vampires are pack animals, they don’t like to be alone and they never will be entirely alone.

There is safety in numbers and they know this.

They also have semi-immortal servants which are kind of half sired that protect them during the day. Like the original Fright Night.

They are very picky about who they sire and get to know their sired children before doing so.

A vampire isn’t moody, they live their lives very similarly to humans if they can and they are often very thoughtful, content creatures.

Because their memory is wiped when they are sired they don’t dwell on their mortal past but rather get on with their existence as though it’s a reincarnation – which it is.

They don’t sparkle.

They don’t rip their victims’ limb from limb.

They don’t taunt their prey.

They can cross water.

They can eat normal food and drink.

They don’t need to sleep in coffins or sleep at all.

That’s what vampires are to me.

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The Wolf’s Rose

The night is chilled and the air is icy

Winter nips at your cheeks and nose

Wandering far into the forest, you are lost my little Rose

Simplicity doesn’t exist where complexity plays

A daring youth like you amaze me in all ways

Hark! Hear the sound of the midnight wolves

Playing a melody to attract lost fools

You follow their tune, blissfully ignorant of the dangers they bestow

And onwards you follow, and onwards you go

Through the nocturnal world you flounder

From tree to tree you flow

Further into the orchestra, into something you don’t know

Into the jaws of hunger

Into the mists of time

Into the raging beasts that are ready to dine

And now you’re here, cold in my arms

A little Rose you’ve been

And I have plucked you from the world and you’ll never again be seen

Not by mortal eyes no how and you’ll stay forever with me

No mortal shall hear your cries when you beg me for release

And now you’ve joined the shadow world

A place that’s made from fear

And you will sup upon mortal babes and breed with me more fear

And nothing shall stop your pain, when you can’t kill anymore

You’ll always give into the hunger and eat their flesh that’s raw

And I’ll be here for you always

My precious little one

To remind you of who it was, that hid you from the sun

Oh my little Rose, look at what you’ve become!

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Filed under Poems S - U

you mortal fool

Nightmares lurking in the shadows

Midnight creeping up the stairs

A cold chill comes to tap your shoulder

What are you here for?

You don’t know what danger I am

You mortal fool

You awful fool

You don’t know who or what I am

You mortal fool

You awful fool

Here I am, I’m cute as apple pie

One step closer, you’re gonna die

I’ve got cute fangs, cute fangs like incy wincy spider

Come to me and I will bite ya

You don’t know what danger I am

You mortal fool

You awful fool

You don’t know who or what I am

You mortal fool

You awful fool

Oh baby, baby what did I say?

Why do you bleed in such a way?

Oh look at your life it’s gone away

Deary me couldn’t you stay?

You don’t know what danger I am

You mortal fool

You awful fool

You don’t know who or what I am

You mortal fool

You awful fool

You don’t know what danger I am

You mortal fool

You awful fool

You don’t know who or what I am

You mortal fool

You awful fool

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Filed under Poems V - Z, Songs

will you accept?

The wine from your veins is sweet

To me this is a rare old treat

For wine is usually metallic

To drink it, I like to be quick

Though no real nourishment I get

For your wound I closely vet

That your health is waning away

So I’ve more or less saved the day

I drink from you my mortal

But I offer you another realmly portal

Will you accept it or not?

Or will you choose your life to rot?

I offer you eternal life

Will you accept this other life?

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mortal shell

Will the effects be long lasting?

Will I end this spell?

Will I be immortal again?

I cannot really tell.

All I know is I’m weeping

Living in a mortal hell

I always sit and wonder

When is there an end to this mortal shell?

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Filed under Poems M - O

About certain poems

There have been some questions about the last poem, who was it written for and why was it so viciously portrayed?

I have to say this, the poem is purely fictional it is about an immortal war, something I’ve been working on as a series for a long time now; it is a goddess whose going through a hard time with her husband’s betrayal, he eventually turns against her entirety (her creations and realm) and sets her own creations against her, draining her of all her goodness and positive energy.  She eventually turns to her family for help against his reign of terror over her and her mortals, but the war becomes difficult as he gives immortal powers to various loyal followers and extends the godly problem into a huge battle that represents something similar to the idea of “the end of days”.

In this story she is demonized by her ex-husband and her mortals forget her as their mother creator and treat her as though she’s a demon etc.

I don’t think this story will be finished for a very long time yet, it’s quite an epic story, rather huge already and I think it could be split into six or seven volumes if a publisher has the patience to get through it, I know the words are already in excess of 250,000 and it’s only a third told so far.

A lot of my poems are based on this story as eventually the goddess is made mortal by her parents to protect her from direct battering from her ex-husbands random and unannounced visits; she lives as a mortal, not entirely sure if her memories are all real and if the spirits whose guiding her back to power are real either, she feels she’s insane and yet reluctant to actually seek psychological help.  She suffers in silence, wishing to go home, back as the goddess she was.

This is an idea I’ve had since I was 9yrs old; I’ve only started to think of it seriously as a novel/epic/series for about four years now.

 

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