Tag Archives: survival

When the bell of life rings

Even the kindest of people can be unthinking and careless with your needs

Never be dependent upon another and their kind deeds

For one day they might go away, walk away or die

They say you mustn’t think of such things, but when you are in need – why?

It is essential to think the worst for what will happen if it does?

You can’t underestimate the power of fate, that even the strongest die

Although many can’t help being needy, like me

It is a scary concept to be in

But you can’t brush it all away under a carpet verbatim

What will happen if I am alone?

Who will care for me?

I can’t rely on charity, to always rescue me

It is a selfish thought I know, but what will happen, where could I go?

Nobody really cares or knows

We are not to talk of such things

No matter how close we are to when the bell rings

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Filed under Poems V - Z

Sunday Word Count 4

Sunday word count four – I’m not on The Wall of Shame huzzah!

This week’s word total is…

12382

And possibly more as I have written approximately six pages of stuff by hand and haven’t typed them up on the computer yet!

It is good but I have written nothing at all for three of the days this week and my only excuse for that is I was exhausted and had gastric flu.  Yes, sorry for the TMI (too much information).

The days break up as this;

11th August – nothing and that’s because our internet is still tetchy, in fact it has been tetchy again today too. 

12th August – 1584 words, which is usually considered a low average for me.

13th August – 7483 words, that is amazing and I wish most days were like this!  Especially as it is still the school summer holiday!

14th August – 637 words, quite low and not at all good in my opinion!

15th August – nothing, because I was busy with other things, mostly reading and calming Henry down and having what seems to be gastric flu.

16th August – nothing again because of the gastric flu!

17th August – 2678 words, which is my good average amount for daily writing.  It is something I would do usually when Henry is at school; it is still the summer holidays so it is amazing I did my average word count for the day whilst he was home!

The writing I have done this week has been mostly notes towards my leprechaun fantasy, including a title change and rewriting certain weak characters to make them have more of a part in the plot of the story, because there was a lot of weak characters, some of which I will be deleting entirely once this fourth or fifth draft is complete. 

I have not included the words towards new story ideas I have had this week, there has been three new novel ideas I have had, but I can’t start work on them until all this other work is finished.  I am not bragging or anything but I really do have a huge backlog of ideas piled up in a corner of this room and it is getting ridiculous because I know that more than half will never ever be started, let alone finished as there is just too many!  I think I must be the only writer in the history of the world who has her own slush pile for what ideas might work and what are weak!

I am also weighing up something in my mind a lot recently.  I love reading and writing fantasy, horror, sci-fi and dystopian stories – I especially love and am addicted to my vampire stories, my saga I am doing.  But I am reading a lot about how a writer shouldn’t really have too many genres under their belt and this is disheartening to me because I love them all.  I can’t release my vampires or my fantasy in particular and there are at least four dystopian stories I really want to write; it seems to me that there are only really two horrors I have planned, so I can release the horror I guess?  Though I have been told by so many people that horror is more of my strength than other types of fiction I write.

I thought I could just write anything and be appreciated just as much, but the more I research the more I am finding that this isn’t the case, I could be found unprofessional and disloyal to my original fan base.  Even to have just the three genres could be too many.  I don’t really know what genre vampires can be put into, because I have found them in so many different sections at the bookstore and in the libraries that they have confused me – they are put into the dark romance, dark fantasy, horror, gothic and erotica sections – so which is it?  Dystopian novels can be put into science fiction, horror or thriller sections too.  Fantasy also has about three sections, dark fantasy, adult fantasy, family fantasy. 

I am struggling to decide which ones to say goodbye to.  My fantasies tend to be comedy family fantasies and some of them are dark, very dark and borderline horror again sometimes with small interjections of dark comedy. 

My Dystopian stories have links with science fiction ideas, new fictional type sciences and leans towards some religious or mythological ideologies or prophecies. 

My vampires are more complexed as the sagas cross into so many genres, science-fiction, horror, romance and fantasy as even my vampires mingle with fairies and so forth.

It is apparently great to be different, but not so different that you can’t define your genre.

If I can’t define my genre right now, how can any of my future agents and publishers?

It is both a depressing and eye opening reality of being a writer.

It makes me feel so caged.

I really love and adore my vampire novels so much and they are a huge part of who I am, but I am not ready to kiss goodbye my leprechauns, mermaids, giants and dragons either.  Nor am I willing to kiss goodbye my ripped up worlds full of warlords and surviving citizens and their struggle for salvation and freedom.

So who is going to take me seriously when I post out my stories to agents in a year or two?

Do you think I worry too much?  Please post what you think in comments below.

Thank you for reading.

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Filed under About my work

Stop trying to synchronise with me

Stop trying to synchronise with me, because if you do I will always change my vibration

I will leave you without a clue

I turn and twist in impossible ways, impassable ways, it’s true

It’s true

I don’t want to synchronise with you

I want to find my own truth

Stop following me, my path won’t make you happy

You’re not like me

You’re not resilient enough, you’re not passionate enough

You mope too much, to be me

You won’t survive being me

So set yourself free

Be yourself, not me

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Filed under Poems S - U

NaNoWriMo Survival Kit

I fully intend to do NaNoWriMo next month; I have a novel fully planned for the occasion.  Whether or not the actual novel will be completed by the end of the month remains to be seen, but I hope that at least half of the story would be done by the end of it. 

I have entered the NaNoWriMo giveaway from the website www.thewritepractice.com to win the NaNoWriMo survival kit, please click the link below to help me gain more entries.

http://thewritepractice.com/giveaways/nanowrimo/?lucky=42129

 

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Filed under My life

I was an essayist and didn’t know it

Sitting back and reviewing my own life, I’ve realized I’ve wasted a lot of time not only living with my mother and worrying about her reactions I’ve actually discovered that in the past I had a lot of talent for writing essays that I didn’t know about.

How I came to this conclusion is simple; I remember reading and researching a lot of subjects and writing up long reports of what I’ve found and how I feel about it to forums (outside of the writing category) and doing a good job of it.  Readers found my posts informative and this lead me to become one of the most popular members on two particular sites; one being a spiritual and occultist site and the other being a gardening and survival site. 

I didn’t get paid for these opinions, didn’t think it was anything great; but after researching what an essayist actually is I realized this is what I was when I was living with my mum, bored to tears writing up anything from cosmological theory, theological history, social sciences, bio-science and what was on TV last night, thinking that I was simply wasting my time – I was, but I could have wasted it in a more productive way, by being a paid essayist.

I’ve actually found out my love for writing up information and opinions on my favorite subjects can and have been profitable for many writers in the past; how I sell these essays, I haven’t a clue but I love doing this, I love sharing my knowledge with other people amongst writing fiction as well.

With this being said, I will start to write up essays here on my blog to show you what I used to be like and to also ask the question “am I an essayist or is there something I’m missing in those posts”?

Thank you for reading and your comments are necessary for my fine tuning.

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Filed under About my work, essays

What have we done?

This world is our home, a wonderful dome, filled with such diverse beauty oh what have we done?

Our home chokes to death on invisible black flames of carbon, oh what have we done?  What have we done?

Trees falling all around us, a great infestation of greed pulls them to the ground, oh what have we done?  What have we done?

What do we need so badly that we’re destroying the things we need the most?  Air, land, sea, sky, oh why, oh why, oh why?  What have we done?  Look what we’ve done!

The big brains say we’re progressing, but what is progression?  To die before we’ve lived?  We’ve no other place to go, so why are we cutting the world away like there’s an alternative?

There is no alternative

Oh what have we done?  What have we done?

We’re progressing towards mass extinction, mass end of life, mass death run rife. 

What have we done?

We can stop…

Small changes mean a lot

Giving up comforts for survival maybe our only revival – look what we’ve done, stop this… everyone?

Ignorance isn’t bliss, it’s death…

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Filed under Poems V - Z